Flashback: To Be Stuck In Reverse
by No Fate 1990
Summary: This story is a sequel to "Jubilation Tribulation". Barry has disappeared, probably held captive by Thawne. Thawne brainwashes Barry. Barry becomes his dark future self, Savitar. Iris, Nora, and Jubilee try to restore Barry's memory.
1. Hurricane Barry Part 2

Barry's p.o.v

Rain reign over me now and forevermore.

I can't ignore this feeling that a great storm

is coming. My patience is running thin. My

pain is skin deep. I am unsure if I can

win this war. Will you be able to stand

and endure the blood chaos? Please

forgive me if I may go insane and

lose my way.


	2. Ascending, Descending, and Transcending

Jubilee Allen's p.o.v (She is Barry and Iris' unborn daughter)

"Mom!" I screamed but she couldn't hear me. Her fate was beyond my control. I arrived right on

time, but I was too late as always. Coldhearted, Savitar killed my pregnant mother. Faced with

an uncertain future, I was on the brink of death myself. The flash aka dad caught me before

I could collapse. "Hello my name is Barry. I am your dad" he revealed.

* * *

The Flash aka Barry Allen's p.o.v

"Hello my name is Barry Allen. I am your father" I revealed to my unborn teenage daughter.

Blissfully, she fell asleep on this thought. Before I asked for her name, a time portal sent us

back to my time. Everyone was eager to help this beautiful Jane Doe. I never once left her

side in the infirmity. I discovered her name was Jubilee. Iris became a little jealous.

She demanded to know why I cared about Jubilee so much. Iris almost fainted when

I said she was our daughter.

* * *

Iris' p.o.v

I almost fainted in the hallway when Barry said Jubilee was our daughter. I didn't know how it all

was possible because Jubilee wasn't born yet. I was currently pregnant with her. "Iris, are you

okay?"concerned, Barry asked helping me to regain my balance. "You have just proposed to me, but

I am already pregnant. I am carrying our future. I apologize for withholding this information from

you. I should've told you sooner. I wanted to make sure it was for real" emotional, I confessed.

Thrilled, Barry embraced me and kissed me. "I will always love, support, and protect you and

Jubilee" he vowed. The others were shocked and yet happy for us. Jubilee kept her eyes on

the clock. She counted down to judgement day.

* * *

Jubilee's p.o.v

I was the flower girl for my parents' wedding. Their wedding resembled those I have read about in

storybooks. Even in her pregnant state, mother was a beautiful bride. She made father shed a few

tears. I wished I knew and experienced a love like that. Besides my parents' wedding, there was

another reason to celebrate. Caitlin and Julian were expecting a baby son named Jack. Jack was

born via an emergency cesarean section that was performed by his father. Jack grew up to become

one of my closest best friends. Anyhow, snowflakes fell all around me. They signaled Jack's

impending arrival. Nobody except for me saw him and the snowflakes. "Hello Jubilee" Jack

addressed me as he led me to the dance floor. "Hello, Jack Frost" I teased him.

* * *

Iris' p.o.v

Like a magnet, I am drawn to the fire. Death doesn't care if I am an innocent bystander. I make the

news instead of chasing the story itself. Savitar crushes my body, but he can't destroy my soul.

There is alittle strength and hope left in me yet. Almost completely dead, I witness my baby being

born via an emergency cesarean section. Sounding like rain, my lover's and premature baby's

desperate cries for help go on unheard.

* * *

Still Iris' p.o.v

"Bear down, Iris, Push" Julian instructs me. I hold my breath as if I am going underwater. Barry

offers me extra body support. "I got you" he promises me. His goal for me is to stay calm. All of

the pain and pressure that I am feeling down below makes it hard for me to fight back my tears

and screams.

Still in Barry's p.o.v

Exhausted, Iris collapses into my arms. Both her father and I know something is wrong. "The

baby's head is wedged in the pelvis. A cesarean section must be done at once. I will perform the

operation" Julian informs us. I wanted to Iris to have the pleasure of giving birth naturally, but

I am learning to readjust.

* * *

Barry's p.o.v

I wasn't ready to be a widow or a father so soon. Savitar aka my future self couldn't care less. Pride

blinded him. Mercy was the farthest thing from his mind. I was indeed my own worst enemy.

Depressed, I wanted to kill myself. My family and friends stopped me before I did the evil deed.

Hope, in the form of a sick premature baby, reminded me how truly fragile and precious life was.

I gave my daughter the name of Jubilee Grace Allen.

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback

I cradled my beloved's dying body in my arms. Savitar retreated to the shadows of my mind. Water

and blood soaked my clothes. I realized my wife was going into premature labor. "It's coming" she

gasped placing a hand over her stomach. "Don't push yet" I instructed her. Before we made it

through the front door, she was already pushing. Desperate, I called out for help. Iris listened to her

body's demands more than our friends who warned she would die if she had the baby naturally. She

didn't care about her health. All she wanted was to get the baby out. The idea of a natural birth

frightened me. An emergency cesarean section comforted me some. Iris stayed awake throughout

the surgery that was performed by Julian. Julian performed his wife Caitlin's C-section a few

months ago. Iris and I trusted him a lot. Who knew I would lose a wife and gain a daughter on

the same day?

* * *

Jubilee's p.o.v

Bravely, I enter Savitar's holding cell. "You are a murderer!" I address Savitar aka my dad.

"You are a disgrace" he curses me. He has a lot of darkness in his heart. I wonder however

did we get to this point. "Now that you are here, you have totally ruined the timeline. I was

better off without you" I stress. "Your mother was not what you have imagined her to be. I

had to kill her before she destroyed our lives" he explains.

* * *

Jubilee's p.o.v

Savitar's holding cell is as cold and dark as his heart. He despises me greatly. I don't

understand why he can't just die. "Where did I go wrong?" I plead with him. "We have been

down this path before. The solution to the problem lies within you" dad argues. I bet he

wishes I was never born.

* * *

Time Period: An Alternate Universe

Scenario: An Ultrasound Test

Barry's p.o.v

"Are you ready to see your baby?" The doctor asks Iris and me. "Yes" We respond

anxiously. I hold Iris' hand very tightly and vice versa. The doctor fails to locate a fetal

heartbeat. Eventually, he pronounces our baby to be dead. Tears express what our minds

and hearts can't understand. This is what I get for wishing my daughter was never born.

* * *

Jubilee's p.o.v

Hope still bleeds and shines through even in the darkest of all places. "Don't waste your time with

this fool" Jack says carrying me on his back. Grumpy aka dad throws insults at us. My heart breaks

a little for him. Apart of me wants to get him out of jail. Anyhow, Jack and I visit the nursery where

we encounter ourselves as babies. Standing out in the hallway, we catch a brief glimpse of the life

that we left behind long ago. Barry is obviously sad about something because Caitlin and Julian

keep comforting him. His lips read my daughter has a heart defect and I don't know what to do.

He doesn't understand how Julian and Caitlin can have a healthy baby boy while his daughter is

dying.

* * *

Barry's p.o.v

I notice Jubilee's sixteen year old self and a teenage boy standing in the hallway. "Welcome

to the nursery" I offer holding the door open for them. "Thanks" they smile entering the nursery.

Shocked, Julian and Caitlin look as if they have seen a ghost. I assume they realize they have

just encountered our babies' future selves. "Hello, my name is Jack. I am your son" the teenage

boy reveals to Julian and Caitlin. Emotional, Julian and Caitlin embrace their son who happens

to be my daughter's best friend. Jubilee catches me off guard with this question, "do you love your

daughter?" . Brutally honest, I answer her with "yes of course, I love my daughter". "Your future self

hates me right now. There is bad blood between us. I don't understand how we got to this point"

Jubilee recalls. "You should lean more on my softer good side" I advise her. "I love this kind version

of you. I will always remember you this way" she vows. Sadly, I look down at my beautiful baby girl

who is sleeping in her crib. I can't believe she has a heart defect. "As a baby, your heart is in bad

shape right now. You have a heart defect. Does life get any better or easier for you in the future?"

I inquire. "As a baby, I will have many heart surgeries. These surgeries will save my life" she assures

me.

* * *

Barry's p.o.v

As usual, I visit my daughter in the nursery. I live for these precious brief happy moments with

her. Despite the obvious, she deserves much better. An unexpected "earthquake" rips her from

my arms. Rubble makes it hard for me to find her. I descend into full-blown panic mode.

Savitar and Jubilee's doppelganger fade into the background of my mind.

* * *

Barry's p.o.v

"My son survived that terrible speed force" Julian boasts. I am happy for Julian, but I want him to

acknowledge my pain and sorrow. I have lost my wife and daughter. Two teenage angels remind

me all is not lost.

Jubilee's p.o.v as a teenage angel

The cemetery has become my fortress of solitude. Hiding behind a tree, I eavesdrop on Dad's

conversation with my dead corpse. "You were tiny, fragile, and precious. You deserved much better.

I apologize for belittling you" he sobs heavily. I can feel his heart breaking. "Please stop crying. I am

alive" I drop on him. Dad embraces me as if I am his last only hope.

* * *

Time Period: Alternative Universe

Iris' p.o.v

Now that Savitar is gone, I can concentrate on having my baby. The pregnancy lasted the whole

entire nine months. "You can do this" Barry encourages me in the present time. Our precious baby

girl enters a world full of love and joy. She has become the sunlight of our lives.

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback- Nora is five years old

Nora's p.o.v

Papa places me on his lap. "You are going to be a big sister" he announces to me. I am super

excited because I have always wanted to have a sibling. "Do you want a sister or a brother?"

mom asks me. "I want to have a sister. I can dress her like my baby doll" I emphasize. "The Stork

will you a sister" mom promises.

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback

Place: The NICU

Barry's p.o.v

Iris endured premature labor that was followed by an emergency cesarean section. Our

daughter, Jubilee Grace Allen was quickly taken to the NICU. "She is so tiny" six year old Nora

pointed out when she saw her sister for the first time. Quite weak and fragile, Jubilee rested in

an incubator. She was attached to several different tubes. I wanted to hold my daughter so badly.

Upon request, Iris was given an opportunity to hold Jubilee. Jubilee opened her eyes briefly. She

had my same eye color in which was blue.

* * *

Barry's p.o.v (in a different alternate universe-A Magical Winter Wonderland)

Nonstop, snowflakes fall around me. A mysterious dark figure walks toward me. I recognize him to

be Julian and Caitlin's son Jack. "Hello, Jack Frost" I tease him. "Sure" he laughs. "Have you seen

Jubilee?" I wonder. Right on cue, Jubilee rides up in a huge chariot. As Jubilee's nickname implies,

she is an ice princess. It's my fault that she has a hardened heart.

* * *

Place: Star Labs

Jubilee's p.o.v

"I am a mistake. He belittles me. He is unhappy with me. You should just erase me from his

timeline?" I request of Cisco. "It is not that easy" he warns me.

Jubilee's p.o.v continued

"Jubilee Grace Allen" my eldest sister Nori yells capturing my attention. "Please leave me alone. I

don't want you to see me this way" I demand shielding my tears. Nori rubs my cheeks tenderly.

"This is a time to try again instead of quit" she encourages me.

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback

Event: Jubilee's suicide

Nora's p.o.v

She pulled the trigger and I screamed. Like an airplane, Heaven came crashing down on me. I

struggled to breathe or stand up.

Time Period: A Flashback

Situation: Jubilee's suicide

Nora's p.o.v

Grace shot herself and I was an absolute mess. I couldn't stop crying or screaming. I refused to

leave the bloody crime scene even if Cisco and dad tried to pull me away. I clung tightly onto

Grace's corpse. Mom rested a comforting hand on my shoulder. Like Cisco and Dad, she gave

me time and space.

* * *

Barry's p.o.v

Grace was our little special lightning rod. Both her birth and death occurred way too early. Barely

thriving without our child to light your path, it is a real miscarriage of justice. I want to break the ice,

but grief and silence paralyzes me. I am stuck with wondering what could've been tonight. It is your

issue of blood, faith, and hope. I wish I could end your all your anguish. I wish I could turn back the

clock.

* * *

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: The Cemetery

Nora's p.o.v

"There is no body in the coffin. Why are you crying?" a kind familiar feminine voice speaks behind

me. I turn around and Grace embraces me. I almost have a heart attack. "How is it possible that you

are still alive?" I ask my sister. "Lightning struck my corpse that was resting in the morgue" she

explains. Twinkling her pretty blue eyes glow in the dark.

* * *

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: Iris and Barry's house

Barry's p.o.v

Emotional, I throw a family photo album against the wall. Iris is appalled by my behavior. She places

the photo album back on the table. "She entered this world prematurely. She left this world

prematurely" I remind my wife. "I understand" Iris sympathizes with me. A portal opens up in

the middle of our den. Nora has brought Jubilee brought home to us.

* * *

Time Period: A Flashback

Situation: Sherlock exposed Nora's secret about working with Thawne to stop Circada. The

the team especially Barry was shocked. Barry locked up Nora.

Barry's p.o.v

"Dad, I am sorry that I lied" Nora sobs heavily in the cell. "I am sorry that I lied too" I apologize.

My statement increases her misery even more. I leave Nora alone in her pain and grief. Iris

resents me for locking up our daughter.

* * *

Time Period: The Present Reality

Barry's p.o.v

"Come here, Grace" I suggest pulling Jubilee into a tight embrace. Jubilee feels at peace in my

arms. I forgive Jubilee for faking her death. "Your mini me is back" Iris teases

me. "Sure" I chuckle stroking Jubilee's hair. "I betrayed you. I lied to you and you locked me up.

You should do the same with Jubilee" an angry and jealous Nora demands.

Place: The West Allen Household-The Dining Room

Nora's p.o.v

Joyfully, my parents and my sister sit around the dining room. They don't acknowledge my

presence. Unoticeably, I quickly grab and eat a bowl of cereal. "Nora, please join us for breakfast"

Dad invites me. "Yes, please Nori" Jubilee begs me.


	3. The Beauty of Grace and Time

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: Star Labs-The Video Archives Room

Jubilee Grace Allen's p.o.v

Mother's unexpectant pressnce startles me. "Grace, I have been looking for you. I thought you

disappeared like your dad" she teases me. "Unfortunately I am still here" I pout. "I am glad you

are here. Nora and you have been a super big help" mom lifts my spirits. "I am hungry. Lets go

to the lounge" Nora suggests.


	4. Rollercoaster Emotions

Place: The Lounge

Iris' p.o.v

"Earth to Mom" Nora teases me. "I was daydreaming. I am sorry" I apologize. "You must be thinking

about Dad again" Grace assumes. "It is normal for Barry to just disappear. It is impossible for him

to erase himself from existence" I mention to my daughters. Barry's evil future self, Savitar shows

up and starts creating drama.


	5. Even Now We Can Not and We Must Not

Time Period: An Alternative Universe

Place: The Apartment

Iris' p.o.v

I reach for his hands and lips. He takes a step back from me. "You know what the doctor said.

Even now we can not and we must not" he advises me. "We have two daughters in the future.

Their names are Nora and Jubilee. Somehow we are able to have them. We shouldn't listen

to the doctor" I share with him.


	6. A Heart Barely Holding onto Tomorrow

Time Period: Jubilee's Fantasy and Reality

Place: Star Labs

Jubilee's p.o.v

I remember chaos broke out at the lounge. Mom, Nora, and me were stuck in the crossfire. Savitar

aka Dad's dark and evil future self manipulated us. He touched my cheek sending my body into an

immediate shock. I discovered myself back at Star Labs. Caitlin, Cisco, and Jack Frost (Caitlin's son)

had dragged me out of the warzone. Something had went wrong with my heart stint.


	7. Please Say Honestly You Won't Give Up

Please say honestly you won't give up on me and I shall believe -Sheryl Crow, Shall Believe

Jubilee's p.o.v

Silently, a young man observes me from across the room. He gets up from his chair and leaves

the room. Somehow we are related. I want to chase after him, but the others hold me back. They

say his name is Joseph. Joseph is my brother or lackthereof. My mother miscarried him sometime

during the Crisis of Infinite Earths. She didn't know she was pregnant.


	8. Before We Were Separated and Erased

Time Period: An Alternate Universe-The Club

Jubilee's p.o.v

I am a homebody, but my siblings forced me to out of the house. Honestly speaking, I believe Nori

and Joe wanted to come to the club more for their own personal entertainment.


	9. The Unforgettable Story of Jomeia

Place: Still at the club

Jubilee's p.o.v continued

"Excuse me. I must spend time with my boyfriend" Mia Smoak-Mcqueen breaks in. Joe kisses Mia

right in front of Nori and me. He doesn't care if we are watching. "I love you so much" Mia

seduces our brother. "I love you too" he admits.


	10. My Past Present Future

Jubilee's p.o.v continued

Just another good memory or unfinished story

A life that I never knew

Such bittersweet joy

My past present future


	11. I Apologize For Leaving You So Soon

Jubilee's p.o.v continued

He reenters the room and reclaims his place at my bedside. He takes my face in his hands. "You

are in better hands. We were never meant to coexist. I apologize for leaving you so soon" Joe

tells me.


	12. OH Darling Make It Go Away Now

OH Darling Make It Go Away Now -Maxwell, This Woman's Work

Place: Star Labs

Jubilee's p.o.v

Accompanied by Nora, my emotional mom rushes to my sickbed. "OH, my poor baby! I am sorry

about your heart condition" mom apologizes. "Joseph looked after me in your absence. Did you see

my brother walking out of the room?" I deflect. This name, Joseph, stirs something deep inside my

mom. She runs out of the room crying. "Mom miscarried Joseph during the crisis of infinite earths.

She didn't know she was pregnant at the time" Nora reminds me.


	13. A Heavy Bloody Red Downpour

Iris' p.o.v (her thoughts about her miscarriage)

My dying dream

An unnecessary miscarriage of justice

My brutal rude awakening

A heavy bloody red downpour

Your abrupt sudden departure from my womb

An unexpected and unwanted slow long goodbye


	14. When I Bled and Cried My Heart Out

Time Period: A Flashback

Event: The Crisis of Infinite Earths

Situation: Iris has a miscarriage on the Wave Rider

Iris' p.o.v

The ship's unsteady rocking increases my nausea. I vomit in a nearby trashcan. Besides nausea,

I am experiencing painful menstrual cramps. I rest hoping that they will pass over soon. "This too

shall pass" I remind myself. Suddenly, I develop an urgent need to use the bathroom. I make a

mad dash over to the bathroom and shut myself in. A dead fetus, not urien, comes out of my

body. I weep for my son whom I didn't know I carrying. I name him Joseph Bartholomew

West Allen.


	15. Hello My Beautiful Mother

Time Period: The Present Reality

Iris' p.o.v continued

"Hello, my beautiful mother" a male voice shouts out from down the hall way. He probably heard

me crying. "Who are you? Please reveal yourself" I inquire. A handsome young man, resembling

Barry and myself, steps out of the shadows. He gives me a real tight bear hug. "My name is Joseph

Bartholomew West Allen. You can call me Joe for short. You miscarried me and then sent me to a

different realm" the young man refreshes my memory. "Oh my precious son" my voice cracks.


	16. Only Time Knows How Much I Can Endure

Joe's p.o.v

You are genuine and very special to me. You are my blood after all.

I can imagine a future where we live as a family. Only time knows how much I can endure.

Only time knows how long I can remain here with you at this present moment.


	17. My Three Young Adult Children and Me

Iris' p.o.v

"Your father is missing. Nora, Jubilee, and I would appreciate your help in bringing him home" I

plead with my son. "I will stay and help you guys" Joe agrees. Jubilee is well enough to help

Nora, Joe, and me to search for Barry. We find him nowhere around Star City. Cisco tracks

him down at a prison in the future.


	18. Even Now I am So Sorry But Godspeed

Time Period: A Flashback

Place: A Dream or a Time Warp

Situation: During the crisis of infinite earths, Iris tells Barry that she had a miscarriage

Barry's p.o.v

No time, distance, or a crisis can separate us. I run into Iris' arms and give her a long passionate

kiss. Something doesn't feel quite right because her eyes are watery. "You are emotional because

we haven't seen each other in a long time" I assume. Iris takes my hand in hers. "I had a miscarriage

during my time on the Wave Rider. I never knew I was pregnant. It was a boy and you were the

father" Iris drops on me. My heart is broken beyond repair. Thoughts about what could've been

haunt and taunt me. I am on the brink of tears. "I love you. I thank you for telling me about the

miscarriage. I am so sorry. I should've been there for you. The miscarriage wasn't your fault"

I comfort my grieving wife. "His name was Joseph Bartholomew West Allen. I sent him to a different

realm so that he could have a second chance at life. We might see him again" she encourages me.

Her good lifted my spirits.

* * *

Time Period: The Present Reality

Situation: Thawne and Savitar (Barry's evil doppelganger) are holding Barry hostage in a futuristic prison. Barry can't breakthrough the metal bars.

Barry's p.o.v

Thawne and Savitar take pleasure in torturing me. They try to take away my power. They want to

control me, but I refuse to surrender. "I am going to kill both of you" I threaten Thawne and Savitar.

The Legendary speedster, Godspeed rescues me. Together, we win the battle against our enemies.

I discover Godspeed is really my son named Joseph Bartholomew West Allen. Iris, Nora, and

Jubilee worked behind the scenes.


	19. Never Knew How Much I LovedYou Until Now

Barry's p.o.v

I had almost lost my life and you rescued me. I never knew how much I loved you until now. I am glad you are my ride and die partner. Together, we have navigated through every high and low tide of life.


	20. Dad's Departure Nor The Divorce Broke Us

Jack Snow Albert's p.o.v (he is Caitlin and Julian's young adult son)

Although I am glad the West Allen Family is back together, I am jealous. I love and miss my dad

who divorced my mom. He blamed mom for my sister Kylie's death. Kylie was a snow angel in

which is another name for a stillborn. Dad took Kylie's loss very hard because he was the one

who delivered her. I remember she was born prematurely and unexpectedly at Star Labs. Mom

was blindsided by the divorce papers. Dad's departure nor the divorce broke us. Our bond

has been stronger than ever before. I have considered Cisco to be my second father.


	21. Your Tears and Your Heartache Are My Own

Time Period: A Flashback-A Few Months Ago

Place: Star Labs

Event: Kylie's premature birth and death

Caitlin's p.o.v

Julian is appalled to see me at work. He is my colleague, husband and doctor. As my doctor, he

ordered for me to stop working. "You are seven months pregnant. I remember I put you on

mandatory bedrest. I fear and worry there will be another complication with the pregnancy.

You should've stayed at home" Julian stresses.


	22. Even Now We Must Stay and Stick Together

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: Kylie's gravesite

Caitlin's p.o.v

"Hello Kylie. This is your mom. I miss you so much" I sob long and hard. I place a teddy bear and flowers down at the tombstone. "I knew I would find you here at the cemetery" a familiar male voice says behind me. I turn around and Jack pulls me into a tight embrace.


	23. Snow Angel Baby

Caitlin's p.o.v

Love

A bittersweet beautiful disaster

My false hope

Passing through like a shooting star

A dying sweet dream

My snow angel baby

Born and gone way too soon

Echoes of your brief existence

Raindrops and sunshine


	24. Welcome Back, December

Jack's p.o.v

Welcome back, December, ocean deep blue eyes. Magical Winter's tale, a beloved long-awaited Christmas miracle. A bittersweet oracle, Christ's bleeding cross of love. A kind little dove of mine, imaginary divine grace. Tender loving care, that stare you give me. Yesterday's remnants, latch onto me, echoes of what could've should've would've been. A red bloody afterbirth, a brutally shaken faith. Scarlet roses, embers dancing all around me tonight.


	25. Obvious Depressing Spirit

Caitlin's p.o.v

Bluish purple rain

Leftover thoughts and emotions in the wake of your death

Unfathomable unexplainable reasons for why?

In-depth revelations

Soaring sky high tonight

Hold onto me tightly like a teddy bear

Obvious depressing spirit

Pale porcelain ghost

Undefined being without a specific meaning

Roaming muse of mine

Pale porcelain ghost

Lovable black sheep

Everpresent urgent matter


	26. Winter Wonderland

Jack's p.o.v

A brief catch and release

Glowing infant haloes

Echoes of bliss

Our once dead church

Realm of uncertainty

Gainful supernatural insight

Invincible butterfly wings

A bunch of goodnight kisses

Notes exchanged between us

Slipping through my hands is this lost love of mine

Winter wonderland

Enchanted Christmas magic

Real pure clarity and charity of the human heart


	27. Loving and Losing You At The Same Time

Caitlin's p.o.v

Loving and losing you at the same time,

this is merely a game or maybe not.

I am more awakened than ever

before. Loving and losing

you at the same time,

your name rests.


	28. Team Arrow and Godspeed

Place: The Cemetery

Joseph Allen's p.o.v

From afar, Mia and I can spot Caitlin and Jack at Kylie's gravesite. We give them space though. Our main focus is Oliver Mcqueen. Mia's dad, Oliver was the legendary Green Arrow. He died trying to save lives during the Crisis of Infinite Earths.


	29. Maybe I Was Meant To Be Here on Purpose

Joe's p.o.v

Stuck in reverse, everybody and everything

doesn't make any sense. Godspeed, goodnight,

and goodbye; merciful grace. In a world where

birth and death collide, your faith is shaken.

Broken wide open, you dream and swim

in blood and chocolate. Your future appears

uncertain, it must be a sign of the times.

Although you want to relax and rest,

your warring spirit and running impulse

wins in the big picture. I am your ride or die buddy.

Maybe I was meant to be here on purpose.


	30. Her Fragile & Quiet Mental Strength

Time Period: The Present Reality

Place: The Allens' residence-Jubilee's bedroom

Barry's p.o.v

Gently, I knock on Grace's bedroom door and Grace allows me into her room. She is getting ready for bed. "Your mom told me about your heart issue. I wanted to check in with you" I begin. "I am on the mend. You and mom can stop worrying about me" Grace assures me.


	31. Even Now I'll Slow Down My Life For Him

Jubilee's p.o.v

Everyone knows how much

he adores his kids especially

me. His love for me shows through

his eyes, smiles, hugs, and

protectiveness. We live in a

colorful prism, a bubble

or a rosy glasshouse.

Life, Heaven itself,

is a highway waiting

for me. Even now

I'll slow down my

life for him.


	32. Praying For More Time, Grace, & Patience

Barry's p.o.v

Your mind is a traffic jam,

an ever evolving tragic story.

You are a ram stuck in the bushes.

I am praying for more time, grace, and

patience with you.


	33. Before We Lose Our Heart & Purpose Again

Time Period: The Next Morning

Iris' p.o.v

Before we lose our heart and purpose again, we savor and cherish every moment. For example, this morning I cooked breakfast for my husband and our three young adult children.


	34. I Deserve Better But You're Good Enough

Place: Star Labs

Caitlin's p.o.v

While The Allens are catching up, I bury myself in work. Working has taken my mind off Kylie's stillbirth. Cisco's presence startles me. I expected for Cisco to be with Jack who is still mourning Kylie. "I am sorry for startling you" he apologizes. "I forgive you. I must get back to work. The timeline has been changed or broken" I inform him. His pretty brown eyes grow big with shock and concern. "How has the timeline been changed or broken?" he wonders. "Jack, Joe, or Jubilee must've changed the timeline. They are defects. They were never meant to exist" I explain with tears in my eyes.


	35. One of Your Kids or Mine Must Be Erased

Barry's p.o.v

Caitlin and Cisco are unusually quiet. They avoid making eye contact with me. "Why are you two so quiet?" I ask breaking the ice. "Joe, Jubilee, or Jack ruined the time line. They are defects. They were never meant to exist. One of your kids or mine must be erased" Caitlin reveals.


	36. The Longest Fight and Toughest Decision

Barry's p.o.v continued

"The one with the weak heart deserves to be terminated. She is a huge burden on you and Iris" Caitlin hints in reference to my daughter Jubilee. Caitlin's words saddens and angers me. She has never talked bad about Jubilee before this moment. "Jubilee is not a huge burden on Iris and me. We love our daughter. I am not terminating our daughter. She deserves to live no matter what. You should terminate your son Jack" I argue. "Go to hell, Barry. I am not killing my only child for your benefit" Caitlin shots right back at me. Cisco is stuck in the middle of our drama. He wants to leave the room, but he stays put just in case Caitlin or myself may need him for moral support.


	37. Her Birth & Death Could've Been Stopped

Time Period: A Flashback-An Alternate Universe

Place: A Hospital Delivery Room

Event: Jubilee's premature birth

Barry's p.o.v

Iris and I already had two kids, Joseph and Nora. We were content with Joe and Nora until Iris found herself surprisingly with child again. Unlike our previous two pregnancies, our third pregnancy wasn't smooth sailing. A hole was detected in Jubilee's heart. The doctor said it was a matter of time when she died in utero. Against all odds, Iris and I had hope. Abortion wasn't an option for us. Who knew Iris' water would break early?

Presently, the doctor examines Iris and concludes Iris is fully dilated. Iris dreads giving birth prematurely, but her body can't contain the baby much longer. When the moment is right, Iris starts pushing. "I can feel her. She is coming" Iris stresses squeezes my hand. "Jubilee is arriving six months early, but she is right on time. I trust in your ability to bring her into the world" I encourage my wife.


	38. I'm Dead In The Water

I'm dead in the water still looking for you-Ellie Goulding, Dead In The Water

Time Period: A Flashback

Event: Jubilee's drowning and death

Iris' p.o.v

My crew and I voted for Star Labs to have a swimming pool. We used the swimming pool during our off days or whenever. Barry and I kept a very close eye on Jubilee. Jubilee wasn't a good swimmer. We feared her heart or body would give out. She tempted fate anyway. Barry held me back from saving our drowning daughter. The abyss, a whirlpool consumed her corpse. Barry strongly advised me to let her go. According to Barry and Caitlin, her existence messed up the timeline. Her death was necessary for the greater good.


	39. Safe & Sound Even If You're Not With Me

Iris' p.o.v

Flashback, stuck in reverse, it

is a blessing or curse. Safe

and sound even if you're

not with me, sing it out

or dance it out. I trust

and believe the angels

are looking after you

in my absence.


	40. Grandpa Jay, Grandma Nora, and My Father

Jubilee's p.o.v

I remember I drowned in the pool at Star Labs. The abyss, a whirlpool consumed me. I was transported to my grandparents' house. They live on a different earth.


	41. Maybe She Was Better off Elsewhere

Situation: Barry is visiting his parents and Jubilee's doppleganger on a different planet Earth

Barry's p.o.v

She walked pass me

and our eyes interlocked.

I remembered her but she

claimed she didn't know me.

Maybe she was better off

elsewhere in the end.


	42. Undoing and yet Rediscovering Myself

Jubilee's p.o.v

You claim to know the story of my life.

I live in a colorful prism, oblivious to

your reality. Undoing and yet rediscovering myself,

I am losing my memory or maybe not.


	43. Navy Blue Roses & Eyes Fading In and Out

Jubilee's p.o.v

Walking on a tight rope

Inconceivable and yet undeniable false hope

Numerous broken promises or memory lapses

Navy blue roses and eyes fading in and out of view

Even now your rare few spoken words mean everything


	44. Ignorant or Simply Oblivious

Barry's p.o.v

Losing your memory,

your life has been a maze.

You are trapped and stuck

in a hazy purple daze.

You are ignorant or

simply oblivious.

You claim you

don't know who

I am.


	45. It's Time, Little Girl, Wake Up

It's time, little girl, wake up -Ryan Star, Losing Your Memory

Barry's p.o.v

"I don't know you. Please leave me alone" Jubilee's doppelganger demands. "I am your dad. Your memories have been erased or you supressed them" I reinforce. "You should go back to your Earth" Jay recommends.


	46. I am Sorry For Your Loss, Barry

Time Period: An Alternate Universe

Place: The Hospital

Barry's p.o.v

The Speed Force drops me off at the hospital. I am clueless as to why I am here until Joe spots me outside. He gives me a tight big bear hug. "I am sorry for your loss, Barry" Joe drops on me like a ton of bricks. "What happened to Iris and our children?" I ask him. "Your little angels, Joseph and Nora are okay. Iris miscarried Jubilee. Proned to many complications, the pregnancy has been unsustainable. Iris is absolutely devastated" Joe informs me. "Please take me to Iris" I request nicely even though I am on the verge of tears myself.


	47. You Deserve To Live and To Be In My Life

Time Period: Still in the alternate universe where Iris miscarried Jubilee

Scene 1: A Flashback

Place: A Doctor's office

Situation: Barry and Iris learn about the complications with the pregnancy

Barry's p.o.v

I catch up with Iris at the doctor's office. Iris forgives my tardiness. She understands that I have been busy with saving the world. She informs me that Joe and Lucille are babysitting Joseph and Nora. Hand in hand, my wife and I embrace for the doctor's updates on our unborn daughter Jubilee. Jubilee's health status is still grim. The doctor warns we might lose her.

* * *

Scene 2: A Flashback

Place: Iris' recovery hospital room (post the miscarriage)

Barry's p.o.v

"Hello Barry" a solemn Iris addresses me. She rests a hand over her flat stomach. "Barry, I had a miscarriage. I tried to contact you, but I was in a lot of pain. My womb had to be cleaned out asap" Iris sobs pulling on my heartstrings. I fall apart in her arms, ignoring everyone and everything around us. "Your father told me about the baby. I should've arrived sooner" I weep. "You are not at fault here. I should've been more careful" Iris asurres me. "Neither you or I killed our baby. God needed Jubilee more than us" I console her.

* * *

Scene: between a flashback and the present reality

Barry's p.o.v

Iris understands that I have to clear my mind outside. I encounter Jubilee's doppelganger outside. "I know who you are. You are my dad. I am sorry for pretending I didn't know you" she apologizes. "I love you. You deserve to live and to be in my life. Your early demise, Please end this madness at once. This pain and sorrow is unbearable" I demand. "You nor mom didn't rescue me when I was drowning in the pool at Star Labs. You and mom allowed me to die due to my heart condition" Jubilee reminds me. "Your death was unnecessary. I am so sorry. I love you" I cry embracing her.


	48. A Second Chance and Dance

Jubilee's p.o.v

Dangling high hopes

A second chance and dance with you

Wishful thinking

Nirvana

A second chance and dance with you

My breakthrough or just another big letdown

Ever clear and present Grandfather paradox

A second chance and dance with you


	49. You're Losing Your Memory Now & My Hand

You're Losing Your Memory Now -Ryan Star, Losing Your Memory

Time Period: A Flashback

Place: The Speed Force

Barry's p.o.v

The speedforce opened before us. "I am sorry for letting you down. Your life is not a burden or a mistake. Please grab my hand. I am going to take you home" I stressed reaching for Jubilee's hand. "I trust and believe you, Dad" she surrendered. The speed force transported us both home and so I thought.

* * *

Time Period: The Present Reality post Jubilee's death (cause: drowning)

Place: Stars Labs-Barry's recovery room

Barry's p.o.v

I wake up with my precious Jubilee weighing on my mind. "Jubilee is not dead. I encountered her doppelganger. I remember holding her hand. Did she make it out of the speedforce?" I ask Iris and our coworkers. "Barry, you experienced a great fall. We almost lost you. Jubilee didn't make it out of the speedforce" Iris informs me.


	50. Dying In a Bottomless Pool of My Tears

Barry's p.o.v continued

I am dying in a bottomless pool of my tears. I request everyone except for Iris to leave the room and perhaps my life temporarily. Nothing such as a minor heartattack can compare to Jubilee's death. Her drowning and death were unnecessary.


	51. Thrice is Not The Charm After all

Time Period: An Alternate Universe

Place: The Allen's Residence

Situation: Iris' recovery period

Iris' p.o.v

"Bedrest is boring. Our kids need me" I protest. "I can take care of Nora and Joe. I know the real you. You are not fine, physically or mentally. The miscarriage has deeply affected you" Barry advises me. "It hurts, but I just want to move on" my voice cracks. "I understand that you want to move on. The doctor has ordered for you to be on bedrest" Barry reminds me.


	52. Everyday I Will Wake Up and Wonder

Iris' p.o.v

Everyday I will wake up and wonder

what could've been. I am stuck in reverse

and broken inside.


	53. A Time When Grace is Gone

Where you end, where I begin, it is like a river going through -Dave Matthews Band, Grace is Gone

Time Period: A Flashback

Situation: Iris' miscarriage with Jubilee

Iris' p.o.v

The sun, like my sore body, can barely rise up. Painful cramps have paralyzed me.

Something is wrong because I am bleeding heavily in the bed. I can feel my unborn

baby starting to slip away. Barry is busy with saving the world. My physical aliments

prevent me from contacting him. Feeling helpless and hopeless, I cry and scream

into my pillow. My frightened children, Joseph and Nora, wonder what is wrong with me.

Before I can say anything, my dad calls me.


	54. Maybe I Was Never Meant To Exist

Jubilee's p.o.v (as a ghost)

You have lost your memory

and the story that you have

always wanted to believe in.

I remember I was born of

your passion and imagination.

Maybe I was never meant to

exist. Christ will give me a

kiss and hug on your behalf.


End file.
